I've been...

...coughing for the last few days.

I am sick.

Hahahaha Oh my... I was bed ridden yesterday, more or less.

Going out even for a meeting was a bad idea.

I've been having the craziest body sores and coughing attacks...

Blarg =P

God will heal me. (That being said I also took some tylenol. ty God)

***

I was thinking about possibly going after a leadership position.
I wanted to revert the organization back to it's roots, back to it's purpose,
It's pillars.

I talked to a bunch of people about this possibility.

And of course, I got very mixed reviews.

I think in the end I decided not to.

How can I be a part of something that may or may not require me to be in support of something...

That I, and God doesn't support.

Hrm... I was thinking however,

That maybe God's light could've been shined, if I was up there... in that position.

***

But then again... I think the answer is love.

We shouldn't be trying to fix people.

Nothing's wrong with us to begin with... In a... general overview, that is...

Genesis 1:31

Of course, we are sinners, we sin.

We do things we shouldn't do.

We think of things we shouldn't.

We are so human and we need God.

But the fixing comes from love.

We need to love, not fix.

The fixing, happens, but it isn't a concious fixing... no?

What we are concious of, are our flaws.

But our flaws are okay. We are still made that way, and there really is, nothing wrong with us.

We realize that we have our issues, that we need rescue, that although there is "nothing wrong with us", our flaws, our imperfection allows for grace and love to fill us up.

Our Flaws are a blessing.

Our Flaws lead us to love.

Through our flaws, God's glory is known, his perfection.

His Love.

We need to reflect his love.

We need to understand his love for us, so that we too can love.

'Cause we all need rescue...

***

We twist love...

We don't know love...

Not true love...

***

So God, open my eyes, and my ears and my heart.

I want to see, I want to know.

***

I'm sorry, I've twisted love so many times.

How could I have said, "I Love You"

When I didn't know what it really meant...

"Love"

***

I feel so much pain sometimes.

I feel like the weight of the world is there.

I want to open my eyes, and to thank God for making me aware of the pain.

God, would you drown us....

Saturate us...

Flood us...

...with your love.

***

God, you are my joy... But sometimes in the moment it's so hard to see.

Open my eyes...

You are my joy...

Set me on fire...

***

There's so much stuff floating around in my head...

I just want to sleep...

I just want to find rest in your arms God...

You bring me so much Joy, even when I am down.

***

Love is the answer.

Love is going to win.